Alrighty then! I am going to try to squeeze out a post between phone calls, and maybe - just maybe - I might get caught up a little bit. No promises, because you know, even though I sat here for 10 minutes with nuttin', as soon as I typed that, call came in - go figger.
Ok, the Tooth Fairy came, and boy is she GOOD! When the (mostly) sweet (monster) boy lost his first tooth, finally! after weeks of it being loose, Mommy took it and put it in her wallet for safe keeping until bedtime & under pillow insertion...Well, my boy has a tendency to fall asleep on the couch, where we let him stay - sometimes all night, sometimes he gets up & goes to bed. Naturally the couch isn't conducive to tooth hiding, and it really wasn't planned that he sleep there, so the tooth stayed in my wallet overnight. Twice. And twice I had a broken-hearted boy the next morning. But the third time, well the thrird time the tooth fairy got sneaky.
He came in that morning, asking for his tooth, so he could put it in his room and remember to put it under his pillow. Well, Mommy doesn't wake up well, as we all know, so grumpy Mommy, awake all of five seconds is listening to "But MOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM, if I don't put it under my pillow in my room, the tooth fairy won'y be able to find it! She won't even know a I lost it! What happens if she soesn't know I lost it?"
Me: "She knows."
Him: "But what happens if she knows I lost it and she comes to get it and it isn't there?"
Me: "She won't come until it's under the pillow. That's what sends her the message." (Not bad for 10 seconds awake, huh?)
Him: "But what happens if she got the message when it came out and she comes and it's not under my pillow..?"
Me: "Fine! Go get my purse!"
Him: "Where is it?"
Me: "Where is it always?"
And he ran off downstairs to get my purse while I stumbled to the bathroom. @ minutes later he burst back up the stairs with my purse.
Him: "Here you go Mom! Can you get it for me?"
Me: "Do you see me sitting on the toilet..? Have you lived with me all your life..? Why are you asking me to do anything this soon after I crawled out of bed..?"
Him: "But Mom....my tooth...."
Me: "Grrrrrrrrr."
Him: *sigh*
I finished my bidness, and went for coffee, a VERY impatient 5 year old hot on my heels. Down the stairs. Up the stairs. When I sat down at the desk, he immediatly came at me again about the stinkin tooth.
Me: "If you want it that bad, YOU get it."
Him: looking dubiously at my purse "Where is it..?"
Me: "It's in my wallet where it won't get lost."
Him: Digging through my purse to grab my wallet. "Where at in your wallet?
Me: "In the zippered pocket." Did I mention it has several zippered pockets..?
Him: Looking over wallet, trying to decide where to start. "Uh Mom..?"
Me: "It's the outside one silly boy."
He unzipped the pocket as I sipped my first blessed sip of coffee. Then got a confused look on his face.
Him: "It's not in here."
Me: "Yes it is! It's the only thing in there, I made sure the wasn't anything else in there with it."
Him: "It's not in here." At this point, I'm hearing a hint of desperation in his voice.
Me: "Shayne, it's there. I know it's there. It's the only thing in that pocket. Quit doing the "man look"
Him: "There's something in here, but it's not my tooth - it's paper."
Me: "You must be in the wrong pocket, there isn't anything in there with it."
Him: Pulling out a five dollar bill "This is in here - that's it"
Me: "Where'd you get that? I didn't have any cash...Which pocket did you get in?"
Him: "This one." Pointing at the place where the tooth was
Me: "That's where it was - Are you sure it's not in there? And are you sure that's where you found that money?"
Him: "I'm sure."
Me: "Huh..." and suddenly a little light comes on in his eyes...
Him: "You told Daddy last nigh5t you didn't have any money..."
Me: "Yepper, I don't, er, didn't."
Him: "You said my tooth was in here."
Me: "Yep."
Pretty sharp kid, huh?
Him: The tooth fairy took my tooth from your wallet!"
Me: "Well, whattdya know, I guess she did."
And so, the tooth fairy came.
Then we had the "bubble wrap incident" as it is being referred to. I awoke on a Saturday to find my Hunny still asleep - on the couch - downstairs. Now him falling asleep in the living room isn't all that rare. He tends, on the weekends, to get comfy in his recliner and fall asleep in true couch potato style. No biggie. About 80% of the time he wakes about 3 am-ish and stumbles upstairs to bed, and the other 20% he just stays in the chair until about 6ish - which is sleeping in for him. FInding him on the couch though...that's not usual at all. And, let's not forget, by the time I got up it was somewhere between 9-10. My hunny is a morning person. a very morning person. For him to still be asleep at that hour..? Now that's rare.
Me: "Honey..?"
Him: **Groan.
Me: "What's wrong..?"
Him: "I hurt my back."
Me: ***a bit puzzled - after all, he was fine when I went to bed at about 10:30. I was fairly certain he hadn't gone anywhere, as our boy was still up - "How'd you hurt your back?"
Him: *mumbling *"Bubble wrap..."
Apparently after I had gone to bed, Hunny and the boy were down in the living room. Hunny got up to go in the kitchen for something, and on the way he bent over to pick up a piece of bubble wrap and couldn't get back up. He was down for a week. Because of bubble wrap. My big, strong, redneck truck driver was down for a week because of bubble wrap...I know it really isn't funny, and NOTHING about back pain is comical, but still - bubble wrap...
On the way to Stacey's a couple of weeks ago, as we're driving along we passed a car hauler with a seriously wrecked car on it. From the back seat I hear "Mom! Did you see how damaged that car was!?"
I heard it, but since it was coming from the mouth of a five year old, I didn't quite comprehend what I heard for a few seconds. It didn't quite process properly. Banged up..? Wrecked..? Smashed..? Even crashed.. any of those words would have computed immediately. But damaged..? From a five year old..? It just didn't compute right away. Hell, I'm not sure that verbiage - even though it is proper - from an adult would have computed right away...He scares me sometimes. Not in a convetional way, but rather for himself. It's tough being smart and being a kid. It was tough as a girl, and we're half-assed expected to be of above average intelligence, but to be the smart boy..? I tell myself he'll be fine, he has a great personality most of the time, he's not a bit bashful, he's pretty athletic, in a non-sportsy kinda way (does that make sense..?), he's a good looking kid. But still, kids can be very hateful. And it scares me. That child has never experienced someone being "mean" to him. I'm not even sure he'd know they were being mean...He's generally good natured, and doesn't hold a grudge. He can be madder than a wet hen one minute and loves you the next. He'll even make a point to tell you "I'm mad at you right now but I still love you..."
Ok, there's a start at the catch up. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be able to spend more time here, and get (closer to being) up to date. Then I'll have one less thing, one my list of many, to feel guilty about!
See ya laterzzzzzzzzzzz! ! ! !
To and from Russia with love
7 years ago
